Kiki Kerasine

Last night was amazing w/Dustin!! :] Can’t wait for our date coming up!!♥♥♥

Knowing that he would leave something he Loves just to see me, makes me feel so special♥♥♥

[Considering he’s trying to get to me like crazy; Let the chase begin♥]

You know that feeling when you have something on your mind that just won’t go away and you know that it’s something important? It’s like my heart is beating like a hammer and I don’t know how to calm it. I hold my tongue and try not to say too much but what if too much is not enough? I know that there is more than I know to it and that my thoughts are just the beginning. I can’t let them wander too far or I may screw up my chance myself. As long as I stay level headed I’m sure that things will be fine and work out. 

I am confident that if I keep myself calm and don’t let things that may conjure up take hold, I will be okay. Is is bad to say that I trust him? I do. I keep daydreaming and at night my thoughts race so much and images flash that I can’t collect them. I can’t sleep because there are so many thought’s and things that I want to see. Writing my thought’s is never a bad thing it’s always something that cannot be in regret. I can’t wait to hear from him but until then I’ll bury myself in the things that take me away from here.

Do you think that he would find my writing odd? I suppose that it wouldn’t matter considering that my oddities are what draw him to me. If only I could put this kind of focus into my book and get it completed and have what I’ve been dreaming of for years. Do you think that I chose right this time? Do you think that I made the right choice and that it’s going to be okay? I don’t want to keep making the same mistake that I always do. 

I’m trying to move on. Entertain the pain, and let go. I’ve taken the first few steps to moving on and I think it’s good. Nothing Ever Comes of Nothing.

So, I can’t get him off my mind for one second. This suspense is killing me! He’s so cute and waiting for this is driving me insane! Please please please have the next few days go by faster! ◕‿◕ Can’t wait to hug him! Can’t wait for him to hold me!♥♥♥

I’ve got a fire building right behind my eyes and I see everything in burning streams. I will try to die for you. And then one day you’ll have to come out to my grave and dig me up to prove to you that I am really dead. Because I am Dead to you, Because I am dead to every single Heartless part of you.♥♥♥

Sooo somebody is on my mind and it’s preventing me from sleeping at all. I haven’t had much sleep the past couple of nights. I just want time to go faster! I mean there’s only 4 more days and God I’m so anxious! I don’t think I’ve EVER been this excited for something. He gives me bats, my thought’s are racing, I keep fidgeting w/things, I’ve been hyper as hell, my heart beat is still fast, and I’m nervous as hell!!!

 I mean it’s not everyday that a drop dead sexy guy w/his shit together totally digs me and thinks I’m just as sexy. I keep telling myself deep breaths but it doesn’t stifle the excitement at all! His patients is wearing thin and I don’t know.. GAH! I just can NOT wait!! I wish that Monday would just hurry up and get here and over with!! Once Monday is gone then only 1 or 2 days before I get to see him! Only a few days till he’s back and I can stop going insane.

PEOPLE GIVE ME DISTRACTIONS FOR THE NEXT FEW DAYS BEFORE I EXPLODE FROM EXCITEMENT!!!!

Appearance:

I have/had piercings besides the ears.

I want piercings besides the ears.

I have many scars.

I tan easily.

I wish my hair was a different color.

I have friends who have never seen my natural hair color.

I have/want a tattoo.

I can be self-conscious about my appearance.

I have/had braces.

I have more than two piercings.

Embarrassment:

Disney movies still make me cry.

I’ve laughed so hard I’ve cried.

I’ve glued my hand to something.

I’ve laughed until some kind of beverage came out of my nose

I’ve had my pants rip in public.

I’ve touched something sharp/hot/etc to see if it would hurt.

Health:

I’ve gotten stitches.

I’ve broken or dislocated a bone.

I’ve had my tonsils removed.

I’ve had my wisdom teeth removed.

I’ve had chicken pox.

Travel:

I’ve been to Florida.

I’ve driven/ridden over 200 kilometers in one day.

I’ve been on a plane.

I’ve been to Colombia

I’ve been to Cuba.

I’ve been to Niagara Falls.

I’ve been to Ottawa

I’ve been to the Caribbean.

I’ve been to Europe.

Experiences:

I’ve gotten lost in my city.

I’ve seen a shooting star.

I’ve wished on a shooting star.

I’ve seen a meteor shower.

I’ve gone out in public in my pajamas. 

I’ve pushed all the buttons on an elevator.

I’ve slapped someone.

I’ve kissed someone underwater.

I’ve chugged something.

I’ve crashed a car.

I’ve been skiing.

I’ve been in a musical.

I’ve auditioned for something.

I’ve been on stage.

I’ve caught a snowflake on my tongue.

I’ve sat on a rooftop at night.

I’ve pranked someone.

I’ve ridden in a taxi.

Honesty / Crime:

I’ve been threatened to be arrested. 

I’ve broken a law.

I’ve done something I promised someone I wouldn’t.

I’ve done something I promised myself I wouldn’t.

I’ve snuck out.

I’ve lied about my whereabouts.

I’ve cheated while playing a game.

I’ve been in a fist fight.

Death:

I’m afraid of dying.

I hate funerals.

I’ve seen someone/something die.

Someone close to me has attempted/committed suicide.

I have attempted suicide.

I’ve thought about suicide before.

I’ve written a eulogy for myself. 

Materialism:

I own over 5 rap CD’s.

I’m obsessed with anime/manga.

I collected comic books. 

I own a lot of makeup. 

I own something from Pac Sun.

I own something from The Gap.

I own something I got on E-Bay.

I own something from Abercrombie.

I thrive on compliments.

I thrive on hate.

Random:

I can sing low key.

I’ve stolen a tray from a fast food restaurant.

I open up to others easily.

I watch the news occasionally or always.

I don’t like to kill bugs.

I sing in the shower.

I’m a morning person.

I’m a sports fanatic. 

I twirl my hair.

I care about grammar.

I love spam.

I’ve copied more than 30 CD’s in a day.

I bake well.

My favorite color is either white, yellow, pink, blue, red, black, purple, or orange.

I would wear pajamas to school.

I like Martha Stewart.

I laugh at my own jokes.

I eat fast food weekly.

I’ve not turned anything in and still got an A in a certain class.

I can’t sleep if there’s a spider in the room.

I’m really ticklish.

I like white chocolate.

I bite my nails.

I’m good at remembering names.

I’m good at remembering dates.

I have no idea what I want to do for the rest of my life.

People:

..used to ask if I was anorexic/bulimic.

..called me fat.

..say I’m skinny.

..have said I’m ugly.

..have said I’m pretty. 

..have spread rumors about me.

..force me to eat. 

..say I eat too much.

..say I eat too little.

Eating:

I’ve lost weight.

I’ve gained weight.

I’m at my thinnest.

I’m at my biggest.

I’ve lost weight and kept it off.

I’ve lost weight, but gained it back.

My weight affects my mood. A lot.

I diet. 

I’m vegan/vegetarian.

I exercise.

I’ve fainted from exhaustion. 

Family:

I’ve sworn at my parents.

I’ve planned to run away from home before.

I’ve run away from home.

My biological parents are together.

I have a sibling less than one year old.

I want kids.

I’ve had kids.

I’ve lost a child.

Relationships:

I’m engaged.

I’m married.

I’m a swinger.

I’ve gone on a blind date.

I have/had a friend with benefits.

I miss someone right now.

I have a fear of abandonment.

I’ve gotten divorced.

I’ve had feelings for someone who didn’t have them back.

Someone has/had feelings for me when I didn’t have them back.

I’ve told someone I loved them when I didn’t.

I’ve told someone I didn’t love them when I did.

I’ve kept something from a past relationship.

Sexuality:

I’m a cuddler.

I’ve been kissed in the rain.

I’ve hugged a stranger.

I’ve kissed a stranger.

Bad times:

I regularly drink.

I can’t swallow pills.

I can swallow numerous pills at a time without difficulty.

I’ve been diagnosed with depression at some point. 

I have/had anxiety problems.

I shut others out when I’m upset.

I don’t have anyone to talk to when I’m upset. 

I have taken/take anti-depressants.

I’ve slept an entire day before.

I’ve plotted revenge.

It starts in the theatre A night of encounters If I hadn’t been there If not for a cigarette

I am so effin tired!! Waking up at 6h30 and staying awake really sucks..